Chess

"HEY! SUGAR TONGUE!" I hear someone shout outside. Sugar tongue is the name of the punk who lives upstairs.
"SUGAR TONGUE!" I recognize the voice as Elliot Rhinestone. He must be back from jail. He used to live next door but he's been gone since some time last month.
"HEY. HEY SUGAR TONGUE!" I go out to greet Elliot. The dog is barking at him.
"Hey Elliot! How are you?"
"Oh, man!" we hug each other. "How you doing Douglas?"
"Doing well. I haven't seen you for long time. Jake over there told me you got sent to jail."
"Yeah I kicked that motherfucker out. He's sellin my shit and stuff while I'm gone. Now I'm on parole at the house over there next door. I got papers and everything. I gotta clean up cause my PO is coming over. Tryin put some boards up now. The cops know the situation. They come over there--it is no problem cause they know whats up with me."
"Honda! Quit barking. Sorry, Elliot."
"Hey that's okay. That's good. You want the dog to do that. She knows I'm an intruder. She's just barking cause I'm black."
"I wish she wouldn't bark at our neighbors."
"That's okay. You know these--these people," he gets close to talk quietly and eyeball the other house next door. "These people over here--these blacks. They up to shit you know? She knows it so she's barking at them."
"Uh, alright."
"Yeah anyway you oughta come over some time. Jake got the fuck out and its my place now. I had to get him good. I socked him a good one and said 'get the fuck out!' He's gone now."
"Okay, sure. I'm headed up north right now to type up stories. You still got a chess set?"
"You know it."
"Lets play a game before I go."
"Yeah, alright Douglas I'll do that."

We head over to his house and I wait on the stoop while Elliot fools with the breaker so we can have electricity. A man with dreadlocks comes up on his bike.
"Hey brother"
"Hey how's it going?"
"Not too bad," he says. "I see you are wise," looking at my shoes.
"Huh?"
"You keep the asphalt out."
"The asphalt?"
"Yeah bad energies comin from being out on the asphalt" he looks at me with a knowing stare, as though he intends to see if I can interpret the second meaning of what he is saying. Perhaps to put it in a different terminology; I notice he intends to see if I am "down".
"Oh, yeah. Sure."
He takes out a glass pipe and smokes methylbenzoylecgonine.
"You dont mess with drugs do ya?"
"I'm too broke"
"That's good...That's one way."
"Sure."
"You know the government. They call them 'controlled substances'. Think about why they call them that."
"You mean to say they want to control us with them?" I say.
He looks at me.

Elliot comes back.
"Hey man do you think I can have another cigarette?" says Dreadlocks.
Elliot starts shaking his head as he pats down his own person looking for the tobacco pouch."Man. Man! Shit." They simultaneously begin to speak in a language perhaps only angry black people can understand. Elliot is looking through the house for the tobacco. While he does this he cacophonates something which--in my interpretation--is to the effect of "How can you always ask these things of me! How taxing it is when you take and take but give nothing!" and the dreadlock man responds with a sonnet of "I'm sorry I asked you for the cigarettes; I'm sorry I was ever born; please give me a cigarette."

Elliot and I head inside and sit down.
"Yeah shit we gonna have a good game this time. Grab that chair over there Douglas. Pull it up here to the table."
"Who was that guy?" I say
"Man I don't know. He always talkin in riddles or something and smokin shit on my porch. I can't stand that guy."
"Oh."
"This a good opening. This a English opening right here. Dangerous, though."
"Yeah, uh, ok." I move a pawn and the game gets underway.
"You want some beer? Here Douglas have some of this. We'll split it. You talked to Danelle Cyrus at all recently?" his bald head is sweating. There are droplets of sweat on his head.
"No. Not since she left for Berlin."
"Yeah she needs to come back so we can take over this place. I got some serious plans. I'm painting this shit tomorrow cause my PO is coming. Man I went over to your house and now I don't recognize nobody."
"Yeah it changes a lot. I am getting out of there. I'm moving." Elliot takes my knight.
"Yeah you sort of in a bad spot right now. Gotta make some decisions about this chess game right here. Hey if you want you can move in here with me. I need someone around when I'm out most of the day."
"Thanks, but that's okay. I need to distance myself from that house next door. Also I don't think I can live in the same building as Linda."
"Hey man, that's our duty as spiritual warriors. Only thing you can change is yourself." He takes a bishop.
"I feel you. Still, I need to get outta there."
"Hey I talked to Worm. She said she might live here but I don't know."
"Hah! You know Worm? What did you think of her?"
"Well...I don't know how to say this."
"Oh come on."
"She--hmm. She likes to be in control of things."
"Yeah, that's for sure..." Elliot is at this moment kicking my ass in chess.
"Hey, no, you can't go there. Look. The bishop's gonna get your knight if ya do. Don't do that. Gonna getcha." He's skilled enough he's basically playing both sides at the same time. "See that book right there? My brother gave me that one. '500 famous chess games'. I cant tell you how much I appreciated that. When you locked up getting those strategies down is nice. Nobody fucks with me because I am a tactical master." Finally Elliot completely destroys me in the chess game.
"Good game there Douglas. Yeah you play very offensively. You make some good moves when you aren't even trying to play, you know. Still you got to work on that defense."
"Yeah. What have you been up to?"
"Oh man. I'm inventing all kinds of shit over here."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. Lemme--hey listen. Let me share with you some of them. Tell me what you think."
"Yeah? You really want to tell those ideas to a white person? We're gonna steal it!"
"Haha! Hell, you're right about that one. That's why I'm telling it to you though. You the white man. You think some motherfucker is gonna let me patent this shit? You gotta help me out Douglas."
"I'm not in a position to do it."
"Okay so my first idea--you know how people are always getting carpal tunnel? Look at this." Elliot shows me a keyboard screwed to a wooden pedestal on the ground. "It's a keyboard you use with your feet! It's so relaxing. Hey, I was using this last night and it is so relaxing. You put some roller balls on your heels and you just roll your feet around like that and type with it."
"Thats great!"
"I know, right?"
"I should get going. I need to get outta here."
"Hey look at this. See my door? I hooked up a security system." There is some sort of harebrained device with an electrical plug coming out. The device is hanging just above the door knob. "Look: I just plug this thing in and there's this screw through the door connecting the whole thing. Anyone touches this and 'pow'! Nobody is going to fuck with this."
I head north on Shattuck as the sun beats down. I wish I sent him a letter in jail. It would have been good to send him a letter in jail.